Confessions Part 3

I confess that some days I have stood at the door and refused to knock.

I confess that I have stood at the open doors that present themselves outside my local church and refused to step through.

I confess that I have meekly accepted responses I interpreted as my interest doesn't fit what the church wants/needs...perhaps I could be doing something else or that my passion doesn't have a place within the structure of our church. I confess that I used it as an opportunity to wrap up my gifts tightly and safely when I should have been standing up and speaking out. This is my sin. These are my gifts, my calling, my responsibility to journey with Christ.

I confess that I've looked to the approval of and validation by others and often ignored the voice of God giving me words of truth.

I confess that I have taken the easy, convenient road even when I felt the leading towards a more challenging path. I confess that I did not trust enough to walk into a dark unknown future but chose the well-lit and more acceptable route.

And as one might expect from the above words and Parts 1 and 2...I confess that I am a woman without a denomination and potentially without a church to call home. Sometimes that feels overwhelming...not having a connection. But in this moment it also is strangely freeing.